i realized last night that i had taken 100 T3s in the past month for the pain. 100. that's a LOT. i'm taking on average 6 a day, but occassionally 8. i had one left after my 2 i took this morning so i had to go to the doctor to get another prescription. i'm seeing my new gynaecologist a week tomorrow and i'm hoping that he'll be somewhat compassionate, intelligent, etc.
the fucking doctor i saw today, wasn't my regular doctor. i was thinking "why on earth would i wait an extra 20 minutes to see the dude i normally see when i could just be in and out in about 2 minutes... it's all there in my chart that i've been on T3s for a long time... he shouldn't question it."
he didn't. he didn't question it. he fucking LAUGHED. LAUGHED. i couldn't believe it i was SO fucking shocked. i'm sitting there he comes in (he's also the same doctor that told me and my ex 2 years ago when i went on lupron -- apparently if you have the prescription from another clinic but get it administered in a different one a dr needs to talk to you -- and told me and my ex that because i had endo we
were going to have to "toss the frisbee in early" because my "fertility window is closing"... assuming that me and my ex were in a permanent relationship, and he didn't fucking know ANYTHING about my endo!! how fucking dare he make that comment???) and says "so what can i do for you?" i say simply "i just need a prescription filled for tylenol 3." he starts to write it out, "how many would you like?" i say "well i'm seeing my new gynaecologist next week so he might give me more or a different pain killer so i dunno, but i went through 100 in a month, i just ran out this morning." he starts to laugh and looks at me, "you used 100 in a month? hahahaha, ok then, i'll give you 100!"
i'm sitting there thinking... he didn't just laugh. he DIDN'T just FUCKING laugh at the fact that i am in so much pain that i NEED those. he said "well, you know there are other medications that deal with endo" and i cut him off (i'm already pissed) and say "i've tried a lot. i tried lupron -" and he starts to interrupt me with "i was going to suggest that" and i keep going with "progesterone therapy, provera, the mirena iud, acupuncture, herbs, etc." he asks if any helped. i said the mirena did with acupuncture and herbs. he asked why i had it removed. i said i wasn't comfortable with the idea of not menstruating anymore, my fertility is too important to me -- though now i'm having to reconsider if inhibiting my body from menstruating is going to be the best for my endo because then maybe it can't grow. he says "well i don't understand why you'd remove it if it worked. i just don't understand why you would do that." i said there just weren't enough studies telling me that this was ok, then he started making up this bullshit crap that i started to tune out too.
then. hahaha... THEN! he starts to ask why i am seeing a new gynaecologist. i said that i don't like the guy who i was first seeing because i found him to be condescending and i don't appreciate that attitude. he fucking validates my old gyno by saying "well *laughing* sometimes it's a good thing with those guys because then they're at least confident... they think they know what they're doing so they make a decision that another doctor who isn't quite so confident might not make."
i just stared at him and said, "i want a doctor who knows
what he or she is doing... not just thinks
they know." he just stopped, had a bit of a smirk still on his face but looked shocked at what i said and the seriousness of my face. i said i didn't appreciate it when i would ask my old gyno questions and he would just say "well i don't know why that would happen..." or "i don't know the answer to that." ok... if you don't, then fucking look it up
. i was doing my own research anyway for my undergrad thesis on endo, but when i'm finding info out that my gyno could have found in 2 minutes and this is his fucking job
and he didn't bother? that says something. it's his JOB
. he went to how many years of school to become a gynaecologist? and what, now that he's got the fucking title he's just too damn busy? he just decides that he knows everything and doesn't need to further look into anything? REALLY!?
and then... .to top off the wonderful visit with a fucking cherry, this asshole of a doctor decides to say "well... i'm sure we'll be seeing you often enough -- if not because of treatments for your endo, which is such a nasty disease-" (yeah cuz he fucking knows right?) "then at least for your digestive system... if it's still working from all the T3s you've been taking." he laughs. i get up, and walk out with prescription in hand thinking... that didn't just happen.
cross posted to feminist_rage